Kissing Her Like Crazy
by andrella07
Summary: I smile as I look at the silver bands in my hand. They're beautiful. I put the wide one on, Claire will like the smaller one better. It's a perfect fit. Hopefully Claire's fits, but I'm getting ahead of myself-she has to say yes first.
1. Kissing Her Like Crazy

**Kissing Her Like Crazy**

**Andrella07**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing (except my own ingenious mind and a huge ego, both of which will do you no good if you sue me because my ego is so big that I only **_**think**_** I am a genius – true story).**

**Feedback: If you are generous with your reviews I just may turn it into a two-shot.**

**I'd like to thank my beta for beta-ing this – cantholdon. A totally and completely awesome person who is forced to read my stuff before I post because I hold a gun to her head…haha.**

**Ok a small introduction. Carlos is alive (for reasons that will become clear), Wesker was killed in the explosion (none of that 'he had time to jump out with a parachute' shit XD), and there was no horde of Ospreys ('cause I'm just too lazy to explain that away). I think that's pretty much all you need to know. However, I do want to say that this is a total sap-fest. I kid you not. Must be all that angst and evil from AWWH driving my sap-levels to the point where I was busting at the seams with it. Hence this adorable masterpiece. Haha. **

How do I even feel right now? I guess I feel…betrayed. Thinking about what they're doing, what he's doing in _my_ bed, with _my_…wife? Really it's the only word for what Claire is to me, but we're not married. Maybe she wants that. Maybe she really does want the whole package. Should I ask her? I'd have to find some rings, at least one for her. I wonder if K-mart could help. That girl finds more jewelry than a metal detector at a beached pirate shipwreck. And why do I have the feeling that K's already got rings picked out? I bet she's just been waiting for me to finally take the hint. God, I can be so dense. Claire would never ask, but how could she not want it?

I look around at the woods again. I'm supposed to be out hunting, but I can't be bothered to concentrate on staying alert, watching for game. Claire wasn't too happy about me leaving with a high-powered rifle, but I'm doing what I have to do. While she – stupid fucking law. I hate rules. Ok, I don't hate rules, but when I can't break them and Claire is so adamant to follow them, to follow this one, it just tears me up. Truly, it tears me up that I can't give her what she wants. Carlos can. It's bullshit.

The wind changes directions and suddenly my hunting spot is no good. My scent will be all over the place and I'll be fortunate to even see a rabbit now. My luck has turned to shit.

I survived the Hive, the apocalypse, I defeated Wesker as human, I took over an Umbrella ship and sailed all over the world to find survivors and bring them back here. Now it's my turn to settle and suddenly this place has a democracy and laws. It's to further mankind they said, to continue our race and make sure our species has the best possible chance for survival. That's why Claire is with Carlos right now, instead of me.

I sigh again, probably the millionth time that's happened in two minutes.

Claire is still having her period, mind you it's only four times a year, almost as if her body is compensating. I haven't cycled since being injected with the T-virus and that's damn fine with me. I thought that maybe it would return when I became human again, but it never did.

K will soon be up for the rule next, now that's she's past 18. Personally, I think that's a little young for her, but she actually found a match among the survivors that I approve of. Claire was – how do I put this? Against it from the start. The day K-mart brought Tristan home Claire looked ready to kill something. All my money, if money mattered, would've been on Claire taking that guy down in the first second he walked in our house. But she didn't, if anything she was overly polite to point of scaring the poor guy. Not me though. I don't know, K-mart's mature enough to handle herself, and honestly I really like him. In his other life he must've been some kind of sales rep 'cause I bought the bullshit he was selling at full price. He's older than her, but I can tell by the way he looks at K that he absolutely adores her. Claire sees it too; she's just less likely to admit it.

Really, I could've returned hours ago, but I just can't bring myself to start walking in the direction of our cabin. I decide to wait until it's dark out, then maybe I'll go back.

The stupid specialist, somehow our lowly attempt at reviving society was landed with a doctor who was an expert in conception, was wholly driven to give Claire all kinds of tips. He probably gave Carlos instruction too, but I wasn't there for his meeting. He was all about when the right time to try was, that she'd have to take in extra nutrients, what the signs of success were, but the second he started talking about the best positions to conceive – I was fucking out of there.

I never used to be a jealous person. Claire just brings it out of me. Poor Carlos, I say poor Carlos but I don't mean it. He was her first option, and if I'm honest with myself, he was my first option too. Probably the only one I would've let near her. When Claire approached him to ask, me glowering at her side, the guy was sweating under the collar so bad. It would've been funny had it been someone else asking him. He agreed, only after making sure I was ok with it and telling me steadfastly that he would only interfere like Uncles always do. How could I not say yes? Claire wants a child, it will make her happy and for that reason alone I never could deny her anything.

If he's anything but gentle with Claire…I swear to god – if there's one mark on her skin that I didn't make myself I'll kill him. No leniency on that whatsoever. I don't care that Carlos and I fought side by side for years, that we survived the Raccoon City nuking or our time in the desert. I don't care if he was just _caught up _in the moment. If there is one god damn hickey on her – I will murder him in his sleep.

My mind starts to dabble again in dangerous what ifs.

What if it looks like him? 'It' God, if Claire heard me talking like that she'd hit me. I shake my head in self-amusement. She's been nothing but excited over having a baby since I gave the go ahead. It's me who's not excited, who's not looking forward to the joy that children bring.

What if the first time doesn't take? What if he has to come back? Fuck, are we just going to share her, I'll drop her off every other weekend? Again I feel like I'm going to be sick. I already was sick, threw up the second I got out here 'cause all I could think of was the two of them together. I can't stand this.

What if she enjoys it? Yeah, I'm gonna be sick again. There's no avoiding it. My stomach is empty but I still manage a few good gags. I rub the back of my neck with some intent to massage away the anxiety. Even now, I can't help the fact that I'm thinking of Claire returning to the side of the straight, normal people. I was never one for labels. I liked Claire; she liked me – end of story. Oh, I hope that's still our story.

I decide to turn in. It's not dark yet, but I don't want to be alone anymore. I'm still not ready to go home however. I'll head to K's. I'm sure she'll be happy to see me. With the rifle slung over my shoulder I begin the trek to her new house. She moved in with that boy, man really.

I have a bit of a reputation in our town for never coming in from a hunt empty handed, but this time I'll have to make an exception. I don't think anyone will call me on it, not today. Word got out like wildfire that the famous Claire Redfield was going to try and have a child.

Me, I'm just the resident mysterious badass who's always seen at Claire's side. Ok, maybe I'm indulging my ego a bit, but I've earned it. Though very few people know my story and the role I played in humanity's downfall and its regeneration. And I'd rather keep it that way.

The guilt still gets me from time to time, but Claire's always there to hold me through my nightmares.

Only she can take the credit for starting this settlement. Claire was every bit the leader she was in the desert where I found her. She turned that leadership over to the first group we dropped off here after being out at sea for six months to pick up more survivors. There was a very brief discussion of Claire staying behind, but she refused. We stayed long enough to get everyone settled, and then we took back to the sea.

Chris stayed behind, so did K-mart. Claire and I, and our crew of volunteers set out again and again after returning with survivors. We did that for three long years and we weren't always successful. We found people less often as the time went on. Even so, groups started to come in on their own after hearing of a place up north that was free of infection.

By the time Claire and I decided to settle there were seven new towns nearby. I forget the last population count but it grows every season.

Of course the infection free thing was a lie, at least it was a lie until people took up arms and cleared out every undead they came across. Occasionally we still attract a random biohazard, but overall winter, isolation, and safety in numbers has kept us out of danger. Having an adequate supply of anti-virus on the _Arcadia_ helped too, but it's limited. Hopefully we run out of undead to fight before we run out of anti-virus to administer.

Everyone greets me as I walk through town and I return their polite hellos with one of my own. That's just how it is at the end of the world. Everybody knows everybody on a first name basis because we've all shared border patrol or worked the fields when it's time to plant and harvest. I'm always just a little more quiet than most, but secretly I enjoy being in the company of others, so long as I can keep my hands busy.

I knock on K's door, and just like I predicted, she's thrilled to see me.

"Alice! Hi!"

She gives me a loving embrace and I return it.

"Hey, K-mart."

We both pull back, and I can tell by the look on her face that I'm about to be scolded for something.

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Claire right now?"

Of course it would be for this. She knew what was happening today, and she isn't going to stop berating me until she's had her fill. I know it's only because she cares about Claire and me.

"Alice, get your ass back to Claire. She was already here worried sick about you."

I sigh. K-mart is right, naturally. I should be with Claire, but not until I get what I came for.

"Actually, I was hoping to talk to you about something first."

Ok, I'll admit that probably wasn't the right way to phrase it because K-mart is instantly in panic mode. She takes the gun from my shoulder, rushes me inside, and sits me down on the couch in the living room. It almost reminds me of waking up in that motel with K there to greet me. Except I'm not coming to from a psychic exertion induced coma and she isn't nervous-excited; she's nervous-fucked-the-freak-out.

"Alice, you can't be mad at Claire or Carlos for that matter."

I try to cut her off, but she's not stopping. "K-"

"Claire's beating herself up like crazy because she knows this is hurting you, but that's no reason to break up!"

Ok, I really need to stop her now, but what the hell is going to get her attention enough to make her shut up? She's still going at it as I think.

"Everybody has problems in their relationship-"

I've got it!

"I'm going to ask Claire to marry me."

That did the trick. Her mouth is still open, jaw nearly floored, but she isn't talking anymore. Not saying one damn word. I can tell I'm two seconds away from doubting my decision when she suddenly pounces on me. There are tears in her eyes as she wraps me in another hug and I can only hope they're tears of joy. She confirms it a moment later.

"Oh my God, I'm so happy!"

I smile as we part and she's back to rambling again. Typical K-mart.

"Then wait! Why are you here with me? You need to go home and ask her right now!"

"Slow down, K!"

She takes a breath and now I know I have her attention.

"I _am_ going to ask her, I'm just missing some vital equipment."

K-mart raises an eyebrow and I suddenly see how my previous statement could be misconstrued. She laughs, but I'm fighting a blush as I clarify.

"Rings, K! I need rings."

Her eyes widen. "I've got just the thing!"

See, this is why I keep K in the loop. She books it out of the living room leaving me to tap my fingers nervously on my thigh. She doesn't make me wait long.

"Here."

K-mart holds out her hand and drops two rings into mine. I'm not even tempted to ask how she got them, I'm just fucking happy she has them.

"They're nothing fancy," she remarks, "but Claire will love it."

I smile as I look at both of the silver bands in my hand. They're beautiful. My throat is suddenly dry as I put the wide one on my ring finger, Claire will like the smaller one better. K-mart is almost as surprised as I am. It's a perfect fit. Now if only Claire's will fit just as well, but I'm getting ahead of myself – she has to say yes first. I take my ring off.

My heart jumps into my throat. I can't do this. I'd rather face hundreds of undead on a roof top with no way to get down except jump…oh wait, I did that already. I'd rather be pulverized by an axe-hammer – nope, did that too. I'd rather face Wesker and a mutated Dr. Isaacs, as a human, with no weapons but my bare fists, on top of a roof and let's make Wesker carry that axe-hammer. I can honestly say that is a lot less terrifying. K-mart has to be sensing my fear, but if not my next question makes it obvious.

"What if she says no?"

K-mart gives me a reassuring smile. "She won't."

My nervousness however, cannot be quelled so easily. I argue like a teenager, and it's like K and I have suddenly switched roles.

"But what if she does?"

"Alice-"

"I'm _serious_ K, she could say no…"

"_Alice_," she's back to berating me. "Claire loves you. There's no way in Hell she will not marry you."

I take a really long breath, like ridiculously long, and K-mart takes it as a sign to begin a new discussion.

"How are you going to do it? Are you going to get down on one knee and profess that you can't live without her, and that she'd make you the happiest woman in the world if she'd marry you? Or-"

Oh God, this is going to drag on.

"You could call her the love of your life. Or say that you're soulmates!"

Sap overload.

"Are you going to take her somewhere romantic? You could go to the beach! Right at sunset."

K-mart puts a hand dramatically on her chest to take a breath so I interrupted her with a shrug.

"I was just gonna wing it."

Big mistake – mistake with a capital fucking M.

"Wing it? Are you _insane_? You can't just wing it! You have to prepare." K-mart tilts her head down in the kind of way someone does when they're giving you the most important directions of your life. "Get down on one knee, profess your undying love, ask her, and then wait for her to say yes. Which she will. Then you take her in your arms, and kiss her like crazy."

I can't help but laugh. "Thought about this a bit – haven't you, K?"

She lets out an exasperated breath.

"Thought about it? How could I not think about it with the way you two look at each other? It's like when she walks in a room you're always seeing her for the very first time."

That's good. Very good. I let her continue.

"It's like you look at her and the world doesn't matter anymore."

True.

"Like you can see eternity in her eyes."

And we're back to the sap.

"Thanks K, but I think I've got this."

I stand, shake the nerves out of my system by cracking my neck and rolling my shoulders, but they come back stronger than before. K-mart clenches a fist to psyche me up.

"You can do it!"

I _can_ do it. K-mart is right; I've got this in the bag. I've got the rings, I've got me…oh God, is that all I have? I'm about to revert back to uncertainty, but K-mart takes my arm, hands me my rifle, and forces me out the door with a few parting words.

"Don't be a wimp, Alice. Just think about how much you love Claire, and do it."

I am _not_ a wimp. I give her a standard death glare but she just smiles. I readjust the gun on my shoulder, fix my collar, and set off.

Our house is the furthest one from town, but we both like it that way. I take a breath as I enter and steel myself for whatever is about to greet me. There's nothing. The house is empty. That's actually a good thing right now. After being sick I desperately need to brush my teeth. I set down the rifle and walk to the bathroom. I look at my toothbrush. It's the blue one, right next to Claire's white one. It's stupid, but just seeing her damn toothbrush next to mine makes me smile. I need the reminders that Claire is still mine after what happened today. I brush a little overzealously, but I want to be thorough.

I head to the bedroom with apprehension, just in case Claire is there. I don't really want to see the bed. The specialist suggested it take place where Claire was most comfortable, and if that couldn't be in my arms – it would have to be in our bed. I'm being so selfish. She's probably way more upset than she let K-mart see. And I made her feel worse by avoiding her.

I sigh. I need to set things right, but first I have to find Claire. Where does she go when she's upset? The beach. I'll find her there, I'm sure. I exit the house and out of habit take a look at the sun. It's setting, what are the chances?

Claire's exactly where I thought she would be. Before she sees me I check the placement of what will hopefully be her ring. It's in my pocket, right where I put it. She's pacing on the beach, her feet are bare and being washed in the gentle waves. Her red hair is lifting in the wind, but her head is down. She's so beautiful, but in pain. Pain that I caused.

I won't let her suffer any longer. I'll march right to her, tell her that I'm not angry, and beg her to forgive me for being an idiot. I cut through the sand, wade right into the inch deep water, and almost startle her. But she still manages to start speaking before me.

"Alice, oh Alice – I'm so sorry. Don't be mad."

She's crying and I try to cut her off, but she's not having it. "Claire-"

"I'll never do it again. I don't care if this time didn't take or if I never have a child-"

What is it with the women in my life just rambling on? I interrupt her again by taking her hands in mine.

"Claire, listen to me. You have _nothing_ to be sorry for. I was just being selfish and stupid, and I'm not mad at you. I'm sorry I can't give you a child, and I'm sorry I made you feel bad for trying to have one. I want nothing more than to raise a kid with you."

I'm kind of surprised at hearing that last sentence come out of my mouth, but that doesn't stop it from being true. I swallow my pride and prepare to surrender everything for her.

"Even if that means Carlos gets you every other weekend." God, that was difficult. I can tell she sees how hard it was for me. But I feel like I have to add a little something to end of that confession. "Until you're pregnant. Then that son-of-a-bitch is cut off."

She laughs through her tears, and I'll admit that I'm smiling too. I wipe the tears from her eyes, and I can tell this it.

This is the moment I propose. I thought I'd be more anxious, but somehow just looking at Claire makes every butterfly disappear. Here goes.

"I love you so much, Claire. It's like when you walk in the room I'm always seeing you for the first time." I use K-mart's words, is it cheating? Maybe, but it doesn't matter because I'm about to make it my own.

"I'm no saint, and I'm no hero-"

Claire's eyebrow rises. She's not buying it, but I continue anyway. If only K-mart could hear me now.

"But when I'm with you I feel like I can save the world – only because you saved me first. Turn me into the hero you're always telling me I am."

I keep hold of one of her hands and bend at the knee. Because K-mart will kill me if I don't. I wonder if Claire can see where this is going. I pull out the ring and meet her eyes.

"Marry me."

The wait is agony; absolute and utter torture. The wet sand is digging into my knee, the salt in the breeze is making my eyes water, I'm about ready to faint from lack of air, the ring is burning in my fingers until-

Her face lights up like the very sun that is setting in the water behind me. Not that I can see it, not that I'd want to see it if I could choose to look at Claire instead. She slips the silver ring on her finger and her smile grows tenfold. It's another perfect fit. It'll be a fucking miracle if I'm not smirking like a damn fool. But I can feel my smile and it's the epitome of idiotic grins.

I rise from my knee, and she jumps me. I laugh lightheartedly as I swing her around once. Now she's laughing too and it's music to my ears.

Claire's still smiling when she speaks. "I'm going to _marry you._"

It's like she can't believe it. I can't believe it either, but it's true. My mind goes back to K-mart. There's something else I'm supposed to be doing. Oh yeah.

Kissing her like crazy.

**AWWWW! Right?**


	2. The Hero She Says I Am

**The Hero She Says I Am**

**Howdy! So, you asked for a second shot and here it is! It's quite a bit longer than the first and quite a bit more ridiculous. I'm really not sure I can continue after this, but that doesn't mean you can't request it. Mostly because it soooo ridiculous that I can't take it seriously (so y'all probably shouldn't either). You'll see why...I think because it's themed. Haha. So yeah, just enjoy it for the _ride_ it is! **

**Gotta give another shout out to cantholdon, she's like my partner in crime. Scratch that - she is my partner in crime. (pst- cantholdon, hey I think we might have to hold up a train next, what do you think?)**

How do I even feel right now? I guess I feel…like the hero she says I am. I kissed her like fucking crazy, and damn do I feel proud for making Claire so happy. Now she's in my arms, her head on my shoulder, but I can tell her eyes aren't closed. She's looking at her ring.

Damn if that fool grin of mine isn't gonna be plastered to my face forever.

Suddenly we aren't alone on the beach. K-mart emerges from behind a tree as Claire pulls out of the embrace. I wish I could say I'm shocked, but I'm not. She practically sprints to us, and the second she arrives she points a finger wildly at me.

"Ha! I told you she'd say yes!"

I shake my head in amusement. "She didn't say yes."

For the second time in one day I've managed to render K-mart speechless, but Claire comes in for the rescue.

"Yes, I did."

I'm still just shaking my head. "No, you didn't. You just jumped me."

K-mart is suddenly defensive. "Well, she didn't say no, so I'm still right!"

K-mart turns to Claire and I can tell that the conversation is about to get ridiculous.

"Was it horribly romantic? What did she say?"

See? Ridiculous.

I clear my throat, but Claire answers anyway.

"It was pretty damn mushy."

I'm trying everything to not show my embarrassment as K-mart gives a long noise of sweet amusement.

"Awwwwww."

Claire is about to indulge her with details, I'm certain of it, so I interrupt.

"Alright, can you two talk about this later? Maybe when I'm not _right here_?"

Claire chuckles and takes my hand in hers to give it a squeeze. I return it and K-mart is at it again.

"Awww-"

"And that is our cue to leave." I pull Claire away, but K-mart is still on our heels rambling with elation.

"I can't believe it! It's about time you two tied the knot. Now, we need to discuss ceremonies-"

I freeze. "Ceremonies?"

K-mart looks at me like I'm an idiot. "Uh, the _wedding_. Duh!"

Wedding? I just thought we'd wear the rings and be done with it. Does Claire want a wedding? I look at her, but damn it I can't glean the answer from the expression on her face because she's too busy laughing at me.

I'm not even sure if we can have a wedding. Straight couples have gotten married by The Council. Pretty much the whole town attends. But would they marry two women? The Council's always been fair. I still laugh at the fact they call themselves 'The Council,' but they're effective decision makers, and Claire picked out every single one of them. Then again The Council also approved Carlos as a match for Claire. Maybe they aren't so good at what they do after all. My mind backtracks to the word wedding.

I never wanted a wedding, not even as a little girl while all my friends in school were planning theirs. Maybe because they were always so obsessed with the guy.

I look at Claire. I love her curves. Nope, men are not for me.

K-mart rouses me from the eye-ravishing that I really shouldn't be doing in front of her anyways. She'll use it against me.

"So, I'm going to tell The Council."

Claire's stops her. Thank God.

"Hold on K. Let us talk about it, and then we'll get back to you ok?"

K-mart lets out an frustrated sigh. "Fine."

Bullet – dodged.

K-mart leaves us and we make our way home, still hand in hand.

Our house has never felt more like a home than it does when we get in the door. I had been leading Claire, but now she's leading me – right to the bedroom. She's eager, but I'm nervous. Carlos was still the last person to touch her. I lower my head. I can't help the jealousy I feel, and she sees it.

"Alice?"

I can't even look at her, but not because I'm ashamed of her or angry. I just hurt. My eyes fill with tears as we stand in our bedroom. She lifts my head up with a gentle hand.

"I only thought of you."

I smile, but the tears fall anyway. Her words have an effect, but it's almost like the fact that she is trying to comfort me is doing more good. I'm supposed to be happy right now, I just asked Claire to marry me, and she said yes. Claire is supposed to be happy right now. I can't let myself bring her down. There is one thing I have to know though.

"Was he…" I struggle to come out with it, but Claire knows what I'm trying to ask. "Did he…"

I can tell I'm going to hang on her every word, and she doesn't make me wait long.

"He was a complete gentleman in every way."

Damn it. Why doesn't that make me feel better? Oh yeah, because I wanted to have a reason to kill him. I wonder if she knows she just saved Carlos's life. I wonder if Carlos is still thinking it's in jeopardy anyway. God, I hope so.

Claire is about to confess something else however because she knows she has my complete attention.

"I don't think I could ever do that again."

I take a look at Claire, a really good look at her. Her eyes are red and swollen from crying, she looks next to exhausted, and there are new lines of worry on her face that have never been there before. Her hair is also clean; she must've showered when Carlos left. I didn't think about how difficult sleeping with him must've been for her. I can be such an idiot.

She continues, and her voice is soft. "I don't want to. I already talked to Carlos. If this time didn't take we're not trying again. I can't do it."

Oh no. I mean yes, but still no. Claire wants a child so much. Her maternal instinct is unlike anybody I know. The way she took care of everyone in her convoy, then on the _Arcadia_, I know she misses it. Nonetheless I can't stop the joy I feel at hearing those words. I'm being selfish again.

I still haven't thought of how to respond so she keeps talking.

"I'll talk to The Council about it tomorrow. I'm sure they'll pardon me from the rule."

She's right. They would excuse her from anything. I mean, nobody makes the Queen of England follow the same rules as everyone else…at least they wouldn't if there still was a Queen – or an England for that matter. Claire's no queen but, let me rephrase that – Claire's a goddess and us mere mortals are only here to worship her. Wow. Channel K-mart much?

I need to say something; it's my turn to comfort her. But what the hell do I say? I've got it.

"I'm behind you in whatever you want to do, Claire. You know that."

Her smile is only a dim one. Damn. Ok, clearly she needs more, but what? Maybe she doesn't want words – she always was more about action. And if I think about it, that makes sense. She wants to know I still want her. I'll leave out words in a minute, but there's still one more thing I have to say.

"You are so beautiful." That did it. She's smiling fully now, but I'm not done. I bring her in for a kiss, she keeps it chaste, but I have other plans. Big plans. I move her to the bed, never letting her lips go unattended for long.

The fact that I can tell there are clean sheets on the bed makes me feel better. I hope it makes her feel better too. I never meant to make her feel guilty. That might be a lie. It is a lie, but…No, there's absolutely no justification for me trying to make feel Claire like shit for anything. I need to make it up to her. Hopefully my hands can do the trick. They've never let me down before.

We're both already naked when I suddenly think about what having sex could do to her…possible condition. I stop the ministrations to her sensitive skin, and ask Claire; surely she knows if this is allowed after…

"Are you sure we can do this?"

Her pleasure-glazed eyes look up at me in confusion, so I explain a little more. "I don't want to…you know – jostle anything."

She chuckles and takes my hand. I'm quite happy with where she decided to put it as she answered.

"You won't."

I show her just how much I want her, and she's not disappointed to say the _very least._

She cuddles up to me as we lay beneath the covers of our bed, and it makes my heart flutter in my chest. She wanted to return the favor, but I didn't let her. Not that I didn't want her to. I just wanted to make tonight about her. We haven't talked about a wedding yet, but K-mart will probably be knocking on our door at 5 fucking a.m., and if we don't have an answer she is not going to be happy. I bring it up.

"Soooo…" Ok, I'm not very good at speaking sometimes, so sue me. I tried at least.

Claire raises an eyebrow. "So?"

I wet my lips, but it's no good. I can't bring myself to open them again, so instead I grab for Claire's hand, and begin to fiddle with the ring on it. Two seconds later she's figured it out.

"You want to talk about the wedding?"

"Only if you do." I always pawn stuff on her like that. And it always happens the same way, like she'll ask me 'what do you want for dinner?' and my typical response is 'whatever you're having.' She hates it. So, naturally – it's hilarious. This time however, she's just as annoyed and it makes me smile.

"You are SO difficult!"

"Would it help if I said I try really hard to be so difficult?"

She's quick to respond. "It helps me come up with reasons to poison your food."

Damn she's quick.

"But I'm serious this time Claire. If a wedding is what you want, then I'm game."

She's not having it. "Oh no! You don't get off that easily! I refuse to make this decision by myself. I'm not saying one more damn word about it, and you _my dear_-"

She seriously scares me when she uses that tone mixed with a term of endearment to address me.

"Get to tell K-mart why we haven't decided yet when she comes by tomorrow. And I have a feeling she is going to be here very_, very _early."

Damn this woman of mine. Ok, I need to figure out what I want. My mind instantly jumps to the honeymoon. Obviously we couldn't go anywhere, but I hear there's sex. Lots and lots of sex during honeymoons – for that reason alone I say yes! But wait, I'd have to dress up…but so would Claire. Honestly, I'd love to see her in a dress. That's a much better reason to have a wedding. Not that sex isn't a good reason, but we can do that anytime. Claire in a dress however, that's just damn special. Decision made.

"I want to have a wedding."

She's been broadsided by my declaration. "You do?"

I nod, and she smiles.

"Ok then, so do I."

That didn't sound right; she's trying to pull my signature move.

"Wait, do you want to have a wedding? Or are you just saying that because I want it?"

She smirks at me. The deviant.

"You'll never know."

Oh God, if it gets out the wedding is what I want it'll be the end of my awesome reputation. It'll take a damn miracle for me earn back the badass respect I have from everybody. I wonder just what I'll have to do. There's nothing left for me to do! Maybe I'll have to go back to the classics or something, like climb Mt. Everest. That's so lame. I know! I'll collect a huge horde of undead, get them on my trail, climb to the top of Mt. Everest with a pack full of TNT, and blow off a huge chunk of rock that causes a rock slide _and_ an avalanche – thus burying the undead forever in an utter cataclysm of destruction. That should do the trick.

Really, I shouldn't be making jokes about the monsters the T-virus created, that I helped to create. They were people once. No, I'll live with whatever reputation I have. Even if it's as the person who signed the death warrant for the human race. Which it should be. If Claire heard my thoughts right now, she wouldn't be pleased. I'm thankful she can't, but she still senses something is off.

"I do want to have a wedding."

I smile lightly. As happy as I am to hear that I'm not alone in my desires, I still can't help the regret. "It's not that."

"What is it?"

She has to be tired of my guilt by now. God knows I'm tired of it. I don't want to answer her though. I'm sick of always being the one who brings her down.

"Alice, come on. Tell me what's wrong. Please?"

She would say please, and all because she knows I can't her deny anything.

"It's not fair. I shouldn't get to be so happy when so many others aren't." It's not exactly what's going on through my head, but it's close enough.

Claire gives me the same knowing smile whenever I talk about my guilt, and it's comforting to see it now.

"You're wrong, Alice. You deserve every happiness."

Her words cut through the fault like a knife. If she says it, it must be true. I let my hand trace her bare shoulder, and she snuggles closer. It's so ridiculous how she makes me feel.

It doesn't take Claire long to drift off to sleep, it never has. I on the other hand tend to let my mind race whenever I'm still for too long. This is one of those times. My mind is filled with nothing but the thought of seeing Claire in a white dress. This night is truly comparable to some of my best, like the first night I spent with Claire, and the second, and the third – this could go on. I let it, and finally I fall asleep.

Morning came too early. It usually does when Claire's asleep in my arms. It's probably around 7 a.m., and I know we must be mere minutes from K-mart's appearance. To be honest, I'm thoroughly impressed she's waited as long as she has. There's a knock at the door. Knew she couldn't wait forever though. I wake Claire, and get up to dress.

Claire's a little slower out of bed, mostly because when she stretched out she caught sight of her ring, and just stared at it for a while. I yell that we'll be out in a minute because I don't want to face K-mart alone, and then wait for Claire to put on her clothes.

I open the door, Claire at my side. We've both got that just-rolled-out-of-bed-look, but that doesn't stop Claire from looking absolutely adorable. In fact it might add to it. Me, I'm usually just a mess. Couple that with the expression on my face when I see what awaits us outside, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Or maybe that disaster is caused by the fact that K-mart, Chris, the entire Council, and a good chunk of the town is standing on our front porch and pretty much throughout the entire front yard. It takes a lot to surprise me, and I mean a lot. To say I was surprised is not a-bit-of-an-understatement, it's the-fucking-biggest-understatement-of-my-whole-god-damn-life. It is very much one of Claire's 'fuck me' moments.

I look at K-mart, this is all her doing, and if wasn't for Claire hanging on my side I'd wring her skinny little neck. Ok, I could never do that, but I can take a page out of the Redfield handbook and murder her with my eyes.

She's suddenly defensive, and for good reason.

"Don't look at me. It was Chris. You didn't say a damn thing about me not telling Chris. I mean come on! He's your brother," K-mart turns to look at me, "and soon to be _your_ brother-in-law."

Don't remind me. I love Chris, I do. He's just the brother of the woman – how can I put this delicately? I blow her mind every fucking time she's naked, and plenty of times when she's not. Ok, that wasn't sensitive at all, but what can I say? I know how to make her feel good, and I don't care if he knows it. So yeah, that can get pretty damn awkward because he's always trying to assassinate me with his eyes. I couldn't count the number of times that man has given me a death glare for eyeing his sister, or kissing her, or heaven forbid the dreaded – holding of hands. I'll never forget the look on his face the first time Claire kissed me in front of him. It was right after blowing Wesker into the afterlife, and he was shocked. I'm not sure how he managed to stay standing to be honest. What with that heavy brow of his, I swear if he could scowl anymore he would fall on his face from the weight of it. But that's not the look I'm getting now. It's ten times worse.

I desperately want to whisper in Claire's ear to save me from her brother, but I'm afraid he'll take it the wrong way, and attack me.

Luther, a member of The Council, approaches us with a cheery smile. "Congratulations! We were all so pleased to hear the news!"

Damn Chris.

He continues. "The Council has agreed to marry you on one condition."

Condition? I know Luther likes to play basketball, but that isn't the game he's playing right now. I start to glower, and he's quick to placate me.

"You two have to have the biggest wedding this town as ever seen. The Famous Claire Redfield getting married would be a great boost for town morale."

Is Claire really that famous? I mean yeah, she started this place. She kept the people on _Arcadia _happy, for the most part. There was one little case of mutiny, but she handled that too. When we returned The Council begged her to lead them. She turned it down with only an offer to help make decisions, not decide for them. Maybe I don't give her enough credit. I still don't know about this. I'm all for upping morale, but a big celebration? My mind back tracks to Luther calling her the 'Famous Claire Redfield.' If she's got a title I want one too. I already know what it will be – Alice Badass Abernathy. That's right, badass with a capital B. Claire and I actually talked about that a while back, all she did was laugh and punch me in the arm.

I look at Claire, she seems a little nervous as well. I think we can read each other well at this point in our relationship. So I'm pretty confident in my assumption that she's good with a large celebration, and she wants me to be the one to agree to it.

I turn to Luther, and yell loud enough for the whole town to hear. "We'll do it!"

Have I ever mentioned that on seldom occasion, like once in dark-blue moon, which is ever rarer than blue moons – that I can be wrong? This is one of those times.

The whole town is in happy uproar; Claire is in another kind of uproar.

"Alice!"

I suddenly fear for my safety at the thought of eating my next meal. Which will be breakfast. Which will be once everyone clears out, and leaves Claire and me all alone. I swallow involuntarily, and wonder if I can goad K-mart into joining us for possibly the last meal I'll ever have.

Claire smacks me lightly upside the head. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

I can tell that it's a rhetorical question, and that my witty response of 'I was hit too many times in the head with an axe-hammer' will go sorely underappreciated. So I don't say it…plus, she'll murder me if I do. But that might happen anyways.

The Council is watching my predicament with amusement. Chris however, is enjoying it much more than most. The heavy-browed sadist.

Luther tries to help me out, God love him. "There's really no condition Claire, we just thought it would help the town."

Unfortunately for me however, while God may love him, Claire does not. Not that I blame her. If he wouldn't have been so damn obvious in his flirting with me he might not have that old bullet wound. Though to this day Claire and Luther both deny that she shot him. Which is downright baffling because they were completely alone when they partnered up for one of the rescue missions. He came back claiming to be shot by someone before they turned. How convenient. But it was only a graze. I don't know how Claire missed, but she did.

Claire finally succumbs to the needs of the town. "No, it's alright Luther. We'll do it."

The next word out of Claire's mouth, well let's just say I'm surprised again.

"Tonight."

I look at Claire in disbelief. "Tonight?"

She just smiles, and Luther takes it as a sign that it's ok to speak.

"Perfect! I'll start getting everything ready. Have a great day you two."

Great day? Go to Hell Luther, and take Chris with you. I'm not ready for it to be tonight! This is Claire's revenge on me for opening my big mouth.

Luther clears out everyone in our front yard except for K-mart and Chris who join us inside.

I confront Claire. "Why are we doing it tonight?"

"It gives them less time to prepare."

I smile at her. I'm going to marry the smartest woman in the whole damn world. "I love you."

She smiles back, and suddenly K-mart is face first into the conversation.

"Psh, if you think that's going to stop anyone from making it the biggest, most perfect celebration ever – you are severely mistaken."

Ha, as if they could pull off a huge celebration with only one day to get ready…I mean they couldn't right? Then again they already have a big place – town hall, and they already have the workforce – the whole damn town. We're in trouble. I wonder how bad it would be if Claire and I just snuck out of town for a while. I glance at K-mart, and damn it she's happy as hell. She really has been looking forward to this.

I look at Chris, and that's another story. He notices my stare as Claire starts breakfast.

"So ladies, whose last name will you take?"

I hadn't really thought about it, but the way he asked I can tell it's a loaded question. Claire and I manage to respond at the same time.

I say, "Redfield-"

She says, "Abernathy-"

Our eyes meet from across the kitchen and we both laugh. Chris however, is not amused. I don't know what his problem is. Ok, yes I do. He's mad because I'm nailing his sister, and it's about to be legal, or as legal as it can be at the end of the world. But there's something more to his anger. It's almost like he's – dare I say it? Sad. I decide to approach him about it later.

Suddenly K-mart snaps to attention. This ought to be good. She runs to me, trips on one of our dinner table chairs, and nearly falls. She always was a bit of a klutz. She recovers, and her eyes are wide as she speaks to me.

"You have to get out of here!"

"What? Why?"

I don't want to leave, especially if I don't even know why.

"It's tradition!"

Oh God. Not this again.

"You two need to be apart, so it makes your reunion that much sweeter."

I look at Claire, and she's smiling with amusement at K. K-mart tries to move me out the door, but I'm not budging in the slightest. Chris backs her up much to my dislike.

"K-mart is right. You can stay with me until tonight."

Stay with him? I can tell this is it.

This is the moment he murders me!

I like to think that at this point in our relationship Claire and I can read each other pretty well. So I'm desperately trying to throw up red flags in my eyes coupled with the words I'm screaming in my head. 'HELP ME! Don't let them take me!'

It's to no avail. Claire is completely and utterly oblivious.

In fact she's encouraging it with a sweet smile. "Don't worry, Alice. I'll see you soon."

Will you, Claire? Will you really? I begin to let K-mart's pushing move me. At least I don't have to worry about a poisoned breakfast. Then again Chris is a horrible cook, so maybe I do. I'm still trying to fight it.

"Can't I at least get a goodbye kiss?"

Claire raises an eyebrow, and I'm about ready to give her the puppy-dog eyes she can't resist. I'll do anything to get a chance to whisper in Claire's ear to not let them take me away. I'm about to pull out the big guns, but K-mart intercepts my attempt before I can make it.

"No you cannot! Now, I'll stay with Claire, Chris you stay with Alice, and you two will see each other tonight."

Why the hell does Claire get to stay here with K-mart when I'm stuck with her brute of a brother? That's totally not fair. K-mart isn't done with her instruction however.

"Chris-"

Well at least it's instructions for Chris and not me.

"Make sure she wears something nice."

Damn it.

Chris nods, and suddenly he's the one moving me out of the kitchen. I'm tempted to grab for the walls as I pass them. Go out in style – kicking and screaming! But Claire winks at me and smiles. I sigh and surrender to my fate, however horrible it may be.

Chris's house isn't far, but it's far enough that Claire won't hear my screams for help as he murders me. The second we walk inside it gets terribly awkward. I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to be doing with myself. Especially my hands. Do I just rest them at my side? No, too passive. Should I fold them across my chest? No, too aggressive. Do I keep them up like we're gonna duke it out? 'Cause I'm pretty sure that's going to happen. I settle for putting them lightly in my pockets. Make him think that I'm not on guard and then BAM! I have the upper hand…or is it fist? I shrug to myself, and he's suddenly got a very perplexed look on his face.

"What were you just thinking about?"

I notice he has his hands in his pockets. Uncanny.

"Um, nothing." I try, but it's pretty obvious that's lie. Someone of my caliber never thinks about nothing. He smirks.

"Listen, Alice."

Uh oh, he's about to tell me that he hopes I prepared my last will and testament. Well he's got another thing coming because I've never written one, and this is one fight he'll lose. I hope Claire's ok with being an only child.

"I know we don't always get along."

Truer words.

"But I know you make my sister happy, and I just want to say-"

That I'm gonna be swimming with the fishies? No, too Italian Mafia. That you've got a shotgun, 40 acres of land, and a shovel? No, too father threatening the prom date. That you've got a nine millimeter bullet with my name on it? Yep, perfect.

"That I'm really proud to be able to call you my sister."

And I thought seeing half the town on my front lawn was shocking.

"Thanks," I manage.

"But-"

Ok maybe this time it's a death threat.

"I'm a little upset you didn't ask my permission first."

What is it with this man trying to give me heart attack with all this damn sweetness? Well, at least I know why he looked sad earlier. I should've asked him, but honestly I didn't even think about it. Though it's a little late, I can still make amends.

"Chris, I'd like to ask for your sister's hand in marriage."

He thinks it over, and it's ridiculous, but I'm a little nervous he's actually going to say no. Not that he could stop me from marrying Claire.

He scratches his chin. "Absolutely not."

It's not every day that my jaw drops to floor and both of my eyebrows rise at the same time.

Chris throws his head back in laughter. Son of a bitch, I've been had.

"I'm kidding," he says between bouts of laughter. I can't help but smile too.

"Now," Chris has gone back to being serious, "what are you going to wear tonight?"

Great fucking question. All my clothes are at home, and none of them are the kind of quality that would be suitable for K-mart. And if it ain't good enough for K, it certainly isn't good enough for Claire. I shrug, and he's back to scratching his head in contemplation.

"I think I know someone who can help us."

Before we pick out my clothes, Chris and I have breakfast. Everything about it is horribly uncomfortable, but when it's over we leave to figure out my outfit.

Chris takes me to see Jade, one of the survivors we rescued from the Umbrella's hold on the _Arcadia, _who just so happens to be handy with needle and thread_. _I haven't ever spent much time with her, but she's always had a rather cheery disposition. I wonder if that's related. No matter, Chris explains the situation and she's eager to help, so I'll put up with any amount of sunshine this blonde woman can dish if it means I look good for Claire.

Jade dives right in. "You want a dress?"

I shake my head. I haven't worn a dress since the Hive, and I'm not sure I'd be comfortable in one after wearing nothing but practical clothes. Besides, I'm counting on K-mart to make Claire wear one. All eyes will be on her, and that's exactly what she deserves. But if any of those eyes but mine start to undress her there will be blinding going on at the reception. I'm suddenly reminded of Carlos. I wonder if he's going to come. I may still want to kill the man, but I also want him to be there. He's always been a true friend.

"Alright, let's see what else I can get you."

Jade walks to the back of building, and Chris and I are left to putter about uselessly. She's back a minute later with a bundle of clothes for me to try on. I go into the dressing room, and try on outfit number one. When it's on I step out to look in the mirror. Chris sees me first and starts to muffle his laughter with a hand. I snarl, and then get to the mirror to see what's so funny.

There are no words – except that I look like I'm about to take a bullet for the President of the ex-United States. Suits are not for me.

Outfit number two is better, but still not what I'm looking for.

Third time's the charm – or so I've heard. I'm in the dressing room again. I pull on black boot cut jeans, and then a white button up long sleeve shirt. Over that I put on the black vest, much more stylish than the one that went with the suit, and I leave it unbuttoned. My favorite boots and belt will go well with it. But I still have to pass the Chris/mirror test.

I step out and Chris lets out a whistle.

He points to the door. "The outlaws went that way partner."

"Shut up."

I walk to the mirror and Jade is smiling.

I look…Amazing. Sharp. Dangerous. I adjust the collar. It is pretty western, but it's also pretty badass. Always did have a thing for the Great American West, dressed up as a cowboy, or a sheriff, or an outlaw every Halloween when I was younger. I could probably even wear my revolver. The first time Claire saw me I had on my duster coat along with my buckled boots. She'll love this, so it's perfect.

Chris grins. "I have to admit you look good."

If I have to endure the western-style puns that will be coming my way, then he will too.

"So will you cowboy. Suit him up Jade!"

She nods and starts to walk to the back room. Before she's out of earshot I look at Chris and holler.

"Make sure you give him a badge!"

Chris and I both laugh. Honestly, I think that's the first time we've laughed with each other, and not at each other. Something tells there's going to be a lot of firsts today. My throat is suddenly dry. This is going to be the first night I sleep with my _wife._ Oh no, the nervousness is setting in.

Is married sex different than unmarried sex? What if my performance isn't up to par? What if our libido suddenly crashes? Chris looks at me in a baffled reaction to the state of my troubled face.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing, I'm just worried about having sex with your sister."

Did I just say that out loud? Oh shit, I totally did.

Chris is still puzzled; it would seem that he didn't hear me. "You're mumbling, what did you say?"

Thank my lucky stars – that was _close_. But I still need something else to say. Fast.

"I said – nothing, I'm just worried about where to put my six shooter."

That sounded close right? Chris raises an eyebrow and I try to put on a smile, but it's so forced that I just look I ate something sour.

"Don't you have a holster back at the house?"

I act like I hadn't thought of that. "Oh yeah! Thanks, Chris you're a real life saver!" That was a bit over the top, but Chris soaks up the praise. Speaking of things back at the house.

"Actually, if you could go back to my house and get a few things I'd be eternally grateful."

He's interested. "Sure, what do you need?"

To sneak back to house and get a look at my future wife. At least I didn't say that out loud this time. I answer as Jade returns with clothes for Chris.

"I need my holster, black boots and belt, and my revolver."

"You actually are wearing a gun to your wedding?"

Oh Chris – how little you know me. True, it's not really necessary to have a weapon in town. We're well protected. But old habits die hard, and I'm not sure I can think of a better best man than my Smith and Wesson revolver. Actually, I can.

"Hey, you wanna be my best man?" Chris is taken aback, and I'm glad I caught him off guard.

He smiles. "Sure thing, Alice."

Claire isn't going to believe this. I just hope his toast isn't 'Claire, I love you, but Alice is a tool.'

Once Chris's outfit is settled we walk back to his house. When we get there I hang the clothes in his closet so they don't get wrinkled. Chris leaves to get the rest of what I need, and I'm left to twiddle my thumbs…and plot.

I really want to see Claire. Just one little peak and I'll be happy. Something tells me however, that she's under heavy guard. I get excited just thinking about trying to sneak back home. I rise from Chris's couch. It'll be dangerous. I check the location of my pistol. If I'm found there'll be Hell to pay. I slink out the back door. Scouts will be on the alert to watch for my presence. I run to some bushes nearby. The dogs will have my scent, and bay if they get even one whiff of it. I play hide and seek in the woods between our two houses, never letting anything but trees find me. If Chris catches me I'm looking at 20 to life. I dash for the bushes below our bedroom window. If K-mart is the one who finds me it's death by execution squad. I sneak one glance.

There's no one inside. I look around nervously as I open the window. It makes a creak, and I grimace. Oops. I get it just open enough for me to slip in. I can hear voices in the living room. K-mart's, Chris's, a few other people I'm not concerned with, but no Claire. Where is she? I think to check the closet; if her dress is there I want to see it. I tiptoe over, and right as I open the door a hand snakes around my mouth. FUCK!

I've been caught. I close my eyes in regret. I'm dead. I send a final prayer Claire's way. Claire, I love you so much…But, wait. The person's other arm wraps around my stomach, and I'm pulled tightly against a warm body. It's a rather familiar hand over my mouth, and a rather familiar body I'm being pressed up to. Oh yes, very familiar.

Claire whispers into my ear from behind. Her tone is dangerous, and I'm loving it. "What are you doing here Alice?"

She removes her hand so I can answer, but keeps me to her tightly with her other arm.

I whisper. "I had to see you."

"Well, you can't see me." Claire starts to kiss the side of my neck. "It's against the rules."

I look at the closet I opened. There's nothing new in it, so I come to the conclusion that Claire must be wearing the dress right now! I try to turn my head, but she clamps her hand back over my mouth, and I'm forced to look straight ahead.

"No peaking," she scolds.

I try to say 'that's not fair,' but it comes out too muffled. Suddenly K-mart is calling for Claire, and Chris is yelling that he's leaving. I'm going to be discovered!

"Unless you want K-mart or Chris to find you, I suggest you make haste…and don't you dare look at me." I nod. God do I love being her captive.

She kisses my neck one last time. "See you tonight." I'm released, and I bolt for the window. On the way there I knock over our nightstand with my thigh, and nearly fall. Ow. That was real smooth. Claire laughs at my near wreck. I'm so tempted to look back, just once. But K-mart is right, naturally. It will be so much sweeter when I see her tonight.

I make my way back to Chris's house, and I know I have to get back there before him, but I can't take a direct route. I run for it. I just manage to sit back down on the couch, completely out of breath when Chris opens the front door. That was close.

"Hey, I've got your – what happened to you?"

I feign innocence. "Me? What do you mean?" I'm still panting however, and Chris does that thing with his eyebrows. I swallow involuntarily.

"You've got leaves in your hair."

Even though there's no way I'd be able to see the leaves on top of my head, I look up because I'm an idiot. Then I realize I'm going to have to feel for them. I start to pull the leaves from my hair as Chris sets down my things.

It's past lunch, and to be honest I'm glad we skipped it. You would think that killing undead has tempered my stomach to handling just about anything. But thinking about Claire and I in front of the whole town making our relationship 'official' makes my stomach turn.

Chris approaches me. "K-mart wanted to know if you still had your ring. She wants me to give it to her before the ceremony."

Oh yeah, I do. I never even put it on. It's still in my pocket. I fish it out and hand it to him.

"Here. Don't lose that."

He smiles. "I won't."

There are still a few hours before I have to get ready, so Chris and I decide to play poker. I kick his ass every hand even though my mind is hardly in the game.

It's too busy playing games with what ifs.

What if Claire gets cold feet? What if I stand up there, and suddenly Chris appears without Claire on his arm? It could happen. What if she is there and we go through the whole thing, but when it's my turn to say 'I do' I freeze? Or worse, I faint. What if someone objects? My eyes narrow in thought. What if it's Chris who objects? All complete possibilities.

I look down at my cards. I'm about to win again, and Chris knows it.

Suddenly he looks at his watch, and his face turns to panic. "Fuck! We're late!"

"WHAT?" I jump out of my chair, my cards scatter everywhere, and then Chris laughs.

That son-of-a-bitch.

"You're a bastard, you know that?"

He's still laughing. "You looked tense. I was just trying to lighten the mood."

I make my response super sarcastic. "Psh, you're just trying to give me a heart attack so I won't marry Claire."

"And if I am?"

Ok, I was joking, but I honestly have no idea if he is. I glare at him and he smirks.

We only play a few more rounds, and then it really is time to get ready. I'm nothing but a bundle of nerves as I dress. The only thing that's keeping me sane is the fact that I'm wearing a gun on my hip, and I can shoot anyone who makes fun of my anxiety.

Chris knocks on the bathroom door. "You ready, Alice?"

I look in the mirror one more time. One collar fix, hair adjustment, and deep breath later I walk out. Chris can tell I'm edgy. He walks up to give me a pep talk.

"Don't worry. You want to run through what's going to happen one more time?"

I nod.

"Ok, you'll be at the front of town hall. The music will start. I'll walk out with Claire. You try not to faint when you see her 'cause she'll be a damn knock out."

I smile. His humor his working, and he continues.

"Luther will say a few words, you guys do the 'I do's' and put the rings on each other's fingers. Then you kiss her-"

Like crazy.

"But no tongue," he threatens.

I chuckle. "No guarantees."

"And then we fucking party!" Chris suddenly pulls something out of his pocket. "I almost forgot. Don't ask me how I got these."

In his hands are two silver badges. I can't believe it. It's obvious which one is Chris's 'cause it says 'Sheriff Redfield' and mine, well mine is obvious too. 'Alice Badass Abernathy' is really the only thing anyone ever need call me again. And I don't have to ask Chris who he got that from – it has Claire written all over it. I pin the star on my vest, and Chris pins his as well. We're quite the pair, and I'm happy to call him family.

As we walk to town hall I can't help but think of all Claire and I have gone through. Those first few days in the desert, just spent trying to survive and getting to know her. When I found her in Alaska, the fear of not knowing if she would come back from her amnesia, but praying desperately that she would remember me. Our time in prison, where we found Chris, and her memories started coming back. Sailing the seas, her never leaving my side. Settling here, trying to start our life. It all adds up to this.

I take my position inside the building. The Council is lining the wall in front of me with Luther at its head. Town hall is full to the max, and it seems everyone is in attendance. Even Carlos. He meets my gaze, and swallows a little overzealously. Good, the bastard still fears for his life. I try really hard not to laugh at him. I'm not entirely successful.

K-mart is at the stand with me, she's on Claire's side and no one is on mine. But once Chris brings her, he'll stand with me – not that I'll notice or care once Claire is before me.

K-mart smiles at me and starts to whisper.

"Alice, Claire told me what you said, and that is the most romantic thing I've ever heard."

I'm fighting embarrassment, but I have to admit I thought the proposal was damn genius.

She continues. "If you wanna you know – give Tristan some pointers…"

K-mart's in a dress, and she looks adorable. I never did thank her for the rings, but making Tristan the most romantic fool this side of Alaska can do just that.

"By the time I'm done with him he'll make Romeo look like a novice."

K-mart blushes.

Then the music starts. The chords seem familiar, but I can't be bothered with identifying them. I can't be bothered by anything. I turn my head to look down the aisle. No one's there yet. Ok, maybe I can be bothered, bothered a lot. Where is she? My heart doesn't leap into my throat, it fucking jumps off a roof that is being filled with undead.

Then she's there. My Claire. The air doesn't leave my lungs – it's smashed out by an axe-hammer at the sight of her. She's gorgeous. Her red hair is down around her shoulders, just how I like it. Her dress, oh God – her dress. If I die right this very moment I'll die happy, well let me marry her first then Heaven take me. Heaven? Now's not really the time to think about the afterlife. Claire's the only afterlife I need. Her white dress is simple, but she doesn't look simple in it. She looks extraordinary.

Only as an afterthought do I remember that Chris is walking her to me. He's got a damn fool grin, and if I'm not careful I'll catch it. Claire's at my side now and it's too late. My smile is certainly from ear to ear.

Claire only has eyes for me, and K-mart was right, naturally. I can see eternity in them.

I can tell this is it. This is the moment I marry _my_ hero.

We both reach for each other's hands at the same time, and we both smile at the contact.

Luther starts talking, but I'm hardly paying attention. I know I need to listen for him to ask if I'll take Claire to be my wife, I'm not completely daft yet. But the rest of his speech is lost on me. As far as I'm concerned he couldn't say anything more about love and happiness that I don't already know. Thanks to Claire.

My mind snaps to attention when I hear the right words.

"Alice, do you take Claire to be your wife?"

No hesitation whatsoever, no stutter, no embarrassing fluctuation of tone. Just a flat out, perfect, "I do."

K-mart gives Claire my ring. Claire puts the ring on my finger, and now Chris and I aren't the only ones grinning like fools.

Luther turns to Claire. "Claire, do you take Alice to be your wife?"

Ok, I'll admit my heart is in my throat again. But I shouldn't have worried.

"I do."

I reach behind me without even taking my eyes off Claire, and Chris puts Claire's ring in my hand. Her hand still in mine, I slip the ring on.

With Luther's next words, and one more action on our part – it's going to be official.

"I now pronounce you married."

Before Luther can finish K-mart yells. "Kiss her, Alice!"

I certainly don't need any more encouragement, and I'll even put on a little show for K-mart…and Chris. I'm horrible. I move in to kiss her, and she's doing the same. But before our lips touch I lean her into a dip. She's pleasantly surprised, and that's when I go for it.

The place breaks out in applause.

Yep, it's official. I'm married to the most beautiful person on the planet, and she just so happens to be the one who saves me. The one who turns me into the hero she's always saying I am.

Later…

This reception is dragging on. Don't get me wrong, I'm having a great time. But I've heard that during the honeymoon there's sex. Lots of it. Claire makes her way to me after dancing with her brother, and I'm happy to see her.

"Hey sharpshooter," she greets me, and I take her in my arms.

"So, how does it feel _Mrs. Abernathy_ to have finally married the most eligible badass this side of the world?"

"I'll tell you exactly how it feels _Mrs. Redfield_," she leans in to whisper in my ear, "tonight in bed. I hope you've got your riding spurs."

I swallow involuntarily, and my face flushes. Oh, the things she does to me.

Who would've known that the hero she says I am is a damn cowboy?

**So hopefully y'all are cool with cowboy Alice...haha. Reviews make me happier than Alice rendering K-mart speechless, or happier than Chris watching Alice get smacked upside the head by Claire, so leave em, yeah? Well, I've gotta see a woman about a horse, so long partner!**


	3. Plus One

**Plus One**

**As was promised – the final shot! All mistakes are mine, and reviews are always welcome.**

**Enjoy.**

How do I even feel right now? I guess I feel – my thoughts are interrupted by Claire. She's yelling about something. I'm not really sure. I'm a tad busy at the moment trying to put together our latest new piece of furniture. It's got me damn frustrated. The directions are somehow in English that makes no sense, and I pretty much have to go by the pictures though they look like they were drawn by a six year old…or me.

I read the directions out loud hoping they will somehow make more sense that way. "Put Part A into Part B using Part 47-" Part 47? When the hell did we switch to the numerical system? I try to put the pieces of wood together again, but I'm doing it without Part 47, I don't even know where the hell it is. Or where Parts 1 through 46 are for that matter.

Claire hollers again. "Alice!"

"What?" I yell back not really listening to her answer.

"It's now!"

I read the directions again, it definitely says put Part A into Part B with Part 47 – then Claire's words find their way into my thoughts. Now… now. What the hell does she mean by that? Now-now-now…

Oh FUCK!

"_Now,_ Claire?" I about scream as I leap to my feet, and she's just as adamant to scream back.

"Now! Alice!"

I still can't believe it. "_Right_ now?"

"Yes, right now!"

I'm trying to make my feet take me to Claire, but they're not working. Claire gets pissed.

"ALICE! Where the _fuck_ are you?"

It's finally enough for me to get my ass in gear. I run to our bedroom and Claire is leaning up against one of the walls. I'm immediately at her side trying to help her stand. I hardly know what to say so I keep blubbering.

"Now as in – like now?"

I take her arm around my shoulder. I'm two seconds away from just scooping her up in my arms, but she can't believe I'm still asking if it's time.

"It won't be if you don't get me to the damn doctor."

She's joking, but I'm absolutely panicked.

"It can't be now." I'm not ready. Claire makes me ready by smacking me upside the head. A lot harder than normal, but thank God it works. I lift her in my arms and take a worried look at her. Her face is contorting in pain, there's a light sheen of sweat on her forehead, and her arms are cradling her belly. I swear we're at the doctor's house faster than a pack of undead dogs chasing me down.

Doc is an expert in childbirth, and he gave me strict instruction that when it was time to take Claire straight to his house. He had a room all set up strictly for giving birth. Oh god. That's what's about to happen. Claire is about to have a damn baby! We've been preparing since the pregnancy test was positive. I'll admit it's possible I actually prepared too much. I've gone to every appointment with her, read whatever books I could find, and I ruthlessly interrogated nearly every mother and father I came across. It's entirely possible that my new nickname in this town is the 'Crazy Baby Lady'. I just wanted to be thorough, and I over did it. Not only do I know what to expect, I also know every little damn thing that can go wrong. Let's just say that it's not good for my nerves.

"DOC!" I'm completely freaking out. And it's completely obvious when I kick the man's door down, not in – down – as in broken at the handle and the hinges, whole thing falling backwards – that kind of down. I see Doc jump back before it falls on him. I can't even be bothered to apologize for the destruction.

"Get her inside," he says calmly. I take Claire straight to the room he had ready, and lay her down as gently as I can on the bed. Her eyes aren't open, and her breathing is elevated. I feel so damn useless, like I was just taken over by a satellite… again. Doc is on my heels already pulling on gloves.

"I need you to take her clothes off. Her shirt can stay on." I don't even have a chance to be jealous. He's seen Claire that way before, obviously, but I'm way too afraid to not do what he says. I'm pretty sure Claire's never lost her pants faster, which is saying something.

"Ok," he says extra relaxed, almost as if he knows I'm not gonna like what he says next. "You need to leave."

"WHAT?" I'm furious, there's no way in god damn Hell I'm leaving Claire's side.

Doc holds up his hands to try and placate me. "You're too anxious; you'll do Claire no good if you're freaking out. Go outside, maybe go find Chris, take a breath, and when you've calmed down you can come back."

Son-of-a-bitch doctor is right. I need to relax. I take Claire's hand in mine, and her eyes open.

"I'll be back soon, baby. I'm going to find your brother."

She nods and closes her eyes again. I don't understand why she seems to be in so much pain. Claire's tough, a lot tougher than me – who get's freaked out by needles. But then again needles and I have a bit of a history. I give my wife a last look, and walk out the door I busted.

Chris is easy enough to find because I know he's on border patrol. I do not however want to make the trip out there, so I pull out the walkie-talkie in my back pocket. It's already on, and Chris has its counterpart so we can stay in touch. It's ridiculous how close we've grown since the wedding. The walkie-talkies were his idea as Claire got closer to hitting the ninth month of her pregnancy. He didn't want to be left out. Not that I blame him. I walk to K's as I push down the button and call him.

"Chris."

K-mart won't want to be left out either.

He responds back. _"What's up, Alice?"_

"You need to find someone to take over your shift." I take a second to drop the bombshell on him. I can already see his reaction. "Claire's in labor."

A surprised one word comment comes over the device. _"Now?"_

It's funny how alike we actually are. "Yes, now."

"_Now?"_ He tries again, still uncertain. Suddenly I know how Claire feels, I however don't have the option to hit him. So I'll have to stick with verbal abuse.

"CHRIS! YES! For Christ's sake – right now!"

"_I'm on my way!"_ Despite the nervousness I feel, I can't help but smile at his panic. Thank God I'm not the only one who's at their wit's end.

K-mart's house is before me, and I bang on the door. At least I didn't break it down. She opens it in panic.

"What? What, Alice? What is it?"

"Claire's in labor."

She's furious. "Then what the fuck are you doing here?" Honestly, I'm shocked. I don't think I've ever heard her say 'fuck' before. She continues, and I oddly suffer from a real case of déjà vu.

"Get your damn ass to Claire! Jesus Alice, what is wrong with you?"

"Take it easy, Wal-mart."

She glares at me. K hates it when I switch her name for other stores, so naturally I do it all the time – it's hilarious.

I try to explain why I'm here. "I can't. Doc kicked me out until I calm down." There's a pained look on my face and K-mart takes a breath.

"Ok, Alice. Come on." She takes me by the arm. "I'll walk you back, and see if I can't find a way to make you relax."

My nerves still aren't working right as we head back – until K-mart tries to tell a joke. She does it on occasion though I have to say some of them are pretty… dirty. She told this one about what lesbians and mechanics have in common and right in front of Claire. Who happens to be quite handy with... well, let's just say the punch line of that particular joke is – they both use snap-on tools. Claire's face was instantly redder than her hair. This time however, K's joke is much more appropriate.

"You know what I've learned about kids, Alice?"

"What?"

"You spend the first two years teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling 'em to sit down and shut up!"

I bust out laughing. It's exactly what I needed. I'm ready to pull myself together and be there for Claire. Chris meets us at the once-door to Doc's house. K-mart instantly comments on the missing piece of house.

"What the hell happened here?"

Chris smirks as he answers. "If I had to make a guess I'd say Alice Badass Abernathy."

Damn straight. I don't hesitate as I walk on the door into the house, and Chris and K follow me.

"We'll be out here Alice," Chris comments from the living room.

I stop, confused. "What?"

It's K-mart who answers. "It'll be too crowded in there with all of us. Besides, this is a special time for you and Claire."

Naturally, K-mart is right. I nod to them, and walk back into Claire's room.

There's a blanket spread across her parted knees, and the doctor is doing something I don't care to give words to in my head. Let's just say if he wasn't a doctor I'd be smacking him across the face with a damn shotgun. But he is a doctor so it's for Claire's benefit, and not my jealous streak.

I got over my animosity for Carlos the second Claire jumped into my arms with the pregnancy test kit results in her hand. She smiled like she'd received the best news in the world, and she did. We both did. I already made her first dream come true by loving her, and while I couldn't make the second one come true – I could stand out the way while someone else did. I love her. I would do _anything_ for her. It hurt, but the pain was worth it. Though Carlos and Claire never tried again they were successful, and that's all that matters.

I walk up to Claire, there's an IV in her arm, and her eyes are open. She seems to be in less pain. Thank God. I take her hand in mine again.

"Hey baby." I don't think I've ever called her 'baby' so much. But I can tell she's loving it.

Her voice is a little hoarse, but her smile is bright. "Hey."

Doc stops his examination, and speaks to Claire. "Everything is looking perfectly fine. Contractions are normal. You're dilated about four centimeters."

My constant reading and questions have come in handy because I actually know what that means. That means this kid is coming fast. It usually takes an hour to dilate a centimeter at least, but then again she likely started at three. I take a long breath, and Claire squeezes my hand. She's in the throes of another contraction. I seriously hate this. More than I hate it when I destroy motorcycles, not that it happens much anymore… Claire won't let me near them.

The hours drag on. Chris and K-mart are allowed to come in for a little while as Claire continues to dilate, and her contractions grow closer together. They're lasting for longer too. It's entirely possible that by the end of this – I won't have a hand. But I'm willing to sacrifice anything for Claire and our child. Our child. The thought makes me smile. No, it makes my heart light, yet full at the same time.

"Hey Claire," Chris says as he walks and up takes Claire's other hand.

I stand up from the chair I pulled up to her bed so K-mart can see her too.

Claire smiles at them both. "Hey guys."

"How you feeling, sis?"

Chris doesn't often address his sister as such, and I can tell that it's because this is a very sweet moment for him. It is not however, a sweet moment for Claire. For the last hour I've been asking her every variant of that question possible almost every other minute, and she was two seconds from biting my head off like an undead dog when Chris and K walked in. So now, she isn't two seconds away from lashing out, she's lashing out right now!

"I swear to God – if I get asked that question…_one more time_…"

This ought to be good.

"I will tie you all to the anchor of the _Arcadia, _sail to – where we're we Alice when we saw those sharks? You remember – there was like fifteen of them or so, all of them no shorter than six feet long."

I do remember. Oh yes. It was fucking scary as hell because all of the sharks were undead. She's got her facts wrong however. There were actually six sharks, none of them shorter than fifteen feet. I'm not sure if that's better or worse. But I do know one thing – I am _not _going to call her out on her lacking memory skills. Not this time anyway… Last time Claire forgot something – she came at me with a knife.

I swallow nervously as I answer. "That was in the middle of the South Pacific."

"Oh yeah," she recalls, and continues her threat. "I'll sail out to the middle of the South Pacific Ocean, scream 'land ho!' and give the order to drop anchor with zealous glee."

Have I ever mentioned that when my wife is in pain she tends to…we'll go with – be a little touchy? Yeah, true story.

Chris is instantly regretful, but K is laughing. Only she could laugh at a time like this. Of course it could be because she knows there's no way Claire would include her in that plan…unless she was the one dropping the anchor. That would happen.

Another hour passes, and Claire is fully dilated so Doc asked Chris and K-mart to leave. Claire's really sweating now and her face is a complete grimace. She's doing her breathing exactly like she's supposed to, but I'm hardly breathing at all. She looks like she's in so much pain. I'd take it away if I could. I'd do anything, but all I can offer is my hand for her to squeeze and encouragement. She meets my eyes and I kiss her forehead before speaking.

"You can do this, love."

Claire seems to hang on the words as she suffers another contraction. Doc is telling her to push but I can't think straight. I can't really hear him or Claire's groans as she follows the instruction. I have no concept of time or pain or anything. Yet…the doctor's words are still somehow there.

"That's it Claire. I can see the head."

A head? A baby head? I'm really not breathing any more.

"There's a hand."

A hand? A little hand with little fingers? There's no air. I'm dizzy.

Next thing I knew, Claire had done it because a child's wail breaks out. It's honestly the most relieving thing I've ever heard. Doc calls out the gender but I am way too distracted with child's cries to listen to words properly. The doctor is quick to give the baby to its mother wrapped in a soft blanket, and I can't describe the smile on Claire's face as she cradles the baby. I look at the baby, at them both. Claire has tears on her cheeks, and she can't break her eyes away from looking at the little patch of red hair on top of the baby's head. I look too. I've never seen anything so beautiful. My lack of oxygen makes itself known. I really should've taken a breath sooner because the second I do – I faint.

Later…

"Alice…"

Ow. My head. Everything's fogged. I don't really have a sense of self, but I know I hate waking up from… fainting? I fainted? Or was I knocked out? God knows that happens often enough.

"Alice."

At least I know my name this time, considering someone is calling it.

I open my eyes, and déjà vu and I need to have a serious talk because how many times can I wake up to K-mart staring at me? This time, she isn't exactly nervous-excited, more like so-amused-I'll-never-hear-the-end-of-the-fact-that-I-fainted-while-Claire-

CLAIRE!

I jolt upright, nearly colliding with K-mart overhead. "Where's Claire?"

I am so panicked, but I still manage to notice that I'm in Doc's house, in the living room and there's a nice breeze coming in through a wide open doorframe.

"She's fine Alice, so is the baby." K-mart soothes me.

Thank God. I'm so relieved that now I just feel like an idiot. Like the time I landed the plane on top of the prison. Not one of my brighter ideas, I'll admit. Best idea I ever had was being interested in a bunch of damn birds. The T-virus may have done a lot of damage, but without it… I don't even want to think of the end result. Don't even want to imagine where my life would be without Claire.

I need to see her, need to our new baby… girl? Boy? Shit, I totally don't know. Not that it really matters; so long as the kid is healthy I don't care.

I get to my feet and K-mart helps pull me up. We walk back to the room I was last in. Doc, Chris and Claire are all inside.

Doc is blocking my view if them. Damn man won't get out of the way, probably because he's walking towards me.

"Alice, let's check your vitals."

Fuck my vitals. They're vitally vital, but not nearly as much as my need to be with Claire. Plus, I don't do checkups and I HATE doctors, especially doctors with accents. Creepy British accents. Doc tries to take my arm to check my pulse, but I maneuver out of his way with ease. How many times I've been unconscious… one would think I'd be able to tell if I'm ok or not.

"I'm fine." I state and suddenly Claire looks up. Our eyes meet and she smiles. Take my handgun and hit me in the back of the head with it if I'm not smiling too. On second thought, don't do that. I want to see what is causing Chris – Uncle Chris – to make that ridiculous face as he holds something in his arms. Seriously, his eyebrows, heavy as they are, couldn't go any higher on his forehead. And to top it off he's sounds like he just jumped back 20 years to his adolescent, high-pitched voice phase as he coos at the baby.

Claire cocks her head to the side at me. I love it when she does that. I hate it when she adds my name to the move to scold me.

"Alice, please?"

Damn woman. She wants me to let the doctor make sure I'm ok.

I sigh and let Doc take my pulse. A few minor motions later and I'm cleared of all charges.

Chris looks up at me, and while I know he's reluctant to hand the kid over, he'll do it because he knows to do otherwise would be to suffer the wrath of Alice Badass Abernathy. I killed a door; I have no qualms of doing the same to him. I asked Claire, she said she was ok with being an only child. She didn't say that… she slugged me in the arm.

Still, Uncle Chris starts to walk to me and I meet him halfway.

"Meet your daughter, Alice." Chris gives me a smile.

Daughter?

What if I faint again? There's no point to asking that question, I can already tell I would die to keep the kid safe. Lucky for her I don't die easily. Helicopter crashes, rocket launchers, axe-hammer carrying mutations – nothing – can keep me down for long. So I should be around for a very long time to make sure that the two most important people in my life have everything they need.

It's only a moment before the tiny girl is in my arms. I make sure to give her head plenty of support. Her eyes are closed, but her skin is rosy and pink. She looks just like Claire. A second later, the baby stares up at me with the bluest eyes I've ever seen. Even bluer than mine on my off days.

Claire and I decided on names a while ago. Had the child been a boy, we were going to name him after Claire's father. But it's a girl…

I can't say there's a lot about me Claire doesn't know. That the people I get close to… tend to disappear. It was a pretty common condition during the long years after the outbreak. But I don't have to worry about it anymore. Claire, Chris, and K-mart are all my family… plus our new addition. Still, I'll never forget the first person that meant so much to me when I had nothing, no memories, no idea of who I was or what I was capable of.

That's why our little girl's name is… Rain.

Some part of me wonders if I could've loved Rain. I do love Rain. Looking at the child in my arms I know I love Rain.

This is a ridiculously sweet moment for me. I walk to Claire with our child and stand at her bedside. I can't wait to get home and begin the next step in our life. Changing diapers, playing peek-a-boo, making bottles and laying Rain down in her crib so Claire and I can have a little time to our-

…The crib… I forgot to finish the crib!

I'm my defense – who in their right mind could figure out how to put Part A into Part B using Part 47?

Claire's the one who's good with tools! She should've known better than to make me do it! Me? The only thing I'm good at making is coin-filled shotgun shells. _Not _the most productive skill in the world. But I did get good at it… and perfecting my puns.

Last time I killed an undead with one of those… it's been a while, but I got to shout: 'You forgot your change!' Claire's personal favorite is: 'Quarter for your thoughts?'

I am _so _off topic right now. Claire is going to kill me for not finishing that crib.

I look down at the child, I never really looked away from her, but now all of my attention is on her. If it's a poisoned meal or assassination by my own quarter collection, at least I got to hold my daughter first.

Later…

Walking back into our house, Claire at my side, Rain in her arms, I'm more nervous than I was at my wedding. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but Claire has come at with a knife before! My fear is wholly warranted, but it shouldn't have been.

Once in the front door, I look at what should've been a pile of wood on the living room floor. It's not in the state I left it in. Nope. It's a perfectly constructed crib, Part A into Part B with Part 47 and all. Chris must've came and done it while Claire was in labor. Thank God for that man! I owe him, might have to get him his very own six shooter…

I look next to me, happy that I just dodged a potential swing from Claire's knife. But this isn't good. She's scowling anyway. Uh oh.

"Everything alright, Claire?"

The daggers in her eyes are directed straight at me.

"Now _dear…_"

Oh God, there's that tone again. The one where I know I should've thought first before putting my gun away after coming upon what was more than likely a trap. What am I in trouble for this time?

She continues, and I'm about to find out. "How are we supposed to get the crib though the doorframe when it's completely built?"

My face falls. Damn Chris! Sadistic bastard did that on purpose! Get my hopes up and then just crushes them. I could cry, well not really… But I could make him cry. Oh yes.

Claire smiles lovingly. "Don't worry about it. I can take it apart a little and have it done in no time."

I grin back as Claire hands me Rain. My wife is the best.

Claire walks to crib and kneels next to it to evaluate how to best go about it. I feel a little bad, she really should be resting, but she was never one to sit out of anything.

There's still a screwdriver on the bookshelf nearby. She begins to fiddle with the crib, but I'm too distracted by the child in my arms. She's not asleep, but she's so quiet. Too quiet. There's nothing to worry about, she's looking up at me with bright blue eyes. But I want a smile.

I bring my hand up to tickle the corner of her chin. It's Claire's most ticklish spot, but... Nothing. I try that ridiculous baby voice and make noises that can barely be counted as syllables. The kid is tempered steel. I resort to peek-a-boo. Hiding my eyes behind my hand, then I pull my hand back before going…

"Peek-a-boo!" Still nothing. This is unbelievable. My ego is having serious issues with this.

I look off and whisper in exasperation. "Fuck me."

"ALICE!"

Oops.

Claire's reaction was instantaneous. I just cursed in front our child. I should not be allowed to start sentences with 'what if' because all I can think of is…

What if those are Rain's first words?

It seems oddly appropriate and causes me to nearly choke with laughter. At seeing my barely restrained amusement, the baby begins to grin.

Life is good. It's Claire and me… plus a very adorable one.

**Sap... overload! AH! Too much cute! I hope you readers are happy. I finally finished this! Reviews make me smile faster than Alice cursing in front of children... :)**


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